Sunday, November 29, 2009


Somebody is diagnosed with prostate cancer every 8 minutes. Every 18 minutes somebody dies from the disease. This year (2009) there have been 192,280 new cases of prostate cancer in US males alone and 27,360 deaths. It is the second-leading cause of cancer death in the US behind only lung cancer, which killed 88,900 bro’s this year. Everyone is aware of women’s health issues relating to breast cancer, and every-other car that passes has a pink ribbon proudly displayed to confirm the fact that nearly the entire population of the world cares deeply about boobs. However, nobody seems to care about prostate cancer awareness because, frankly, it’s not sexy. Quite the opposite, actually. So this year I decided to join an elite organization of men (and a few hirsute women) who’s only goal is to change the face of men’s health.

Since 2003 the Movember movement has been raising awareness about men's health issues, and the donations that the foundation brings in each year directly help over 22,000 dudes with prostate and testicular cancer through research and development into cures, prevention and education. All the organization asks in return is that members start off the month clean-shaven and grow a moustache for the entire month formerly known as November. The style of your Mo is up to artistic discretion. This seemingly simple task is not without it’s perils, however. In 2006 five men died from complications which all started from ingrown mustache hairs. And I’m sure I can speak for many of my other Mo Bro’s when I say that the backlash from the opposite sex is…substantial. But the cause is just, and The Hippy talked me into it, so you can blame him.

Anyway, I have dutifully rocked the Mo for the entire month.of Movember. I think I’ve probably raised more eyebrows than awareness, but whenever people ask what the Hell is wrong with my face I take it as an opportunity to curse The Hippy and preach the prostate cancer gospel. My manscaping effort is shown in the pic above. It turns out that without trimming the beast for 30 days my Mo will grow ~3/4 inch. That ends up being around .00000231 miles per hour, not exactly a blistering pace, but respectable enough to warrant looks of disdain all month. For your education, the longest mo on record belonged to an Indian gent and was 12.5 feet long in 2004. He hadn’t shaved in 22 years. Ew.

Let’s just say that if I were to let mine grow out for another month I would be looking for other accommodations…It was a fun ride for a worthy cause, and if anyone wants a ride of their own you’ve got one day to speak up.

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